In the fall of 1682, a small detachment of Spanish Lancers was dispatched to Santa Fe, New Mexico from Nueva Valladolid, Old Mexico. In command was Don Juan Estufa de la Escoba y Tornillo, a distinguished colonial career officer in the service of the King of Spain. Hidalgo Don Juan's instructions were to reach Santa Fe before winter and to assess the damage caused by the Pueblo Revolt of 1690.
The expedition was without incident until they
reached El Paso del Norte where the lancers prevailed on their
commander to spend the weekend in Juarez. The tonic of the crisp
fall weather made the prospect of drinking a little sangría
and chatting with the local muchachas very attractive. Don
Juan acquiesced, and he and his lancers quickly became quite festive.
The truth is that they were soon numbed out of their Spanish gourds
by the sangría and the charms of the northern chicas.
The only individuals happy the next morning were a few Juarez
party caterers and the chamacas.1
Don Juan was still borracho Sunday morning when he departed
Juarez; and in the fog of his hangover, he made a wrong turn when
he crossed the Río Bravo or the Rio Grande into El Paso
del Norte. The misguided Estufa Expedition; instead of continuing
north toward Santa Fe, went eastward down the river until they
reached the present day location of Yesleta.
1 1 This famous Juarez Saturday night
is known in history as La noche cruda or in English as
The big hangover. Earlier versions of La Cucaracha,
a traditional Mexican ballad, refer to this night also. This cruda
and subsequent events changed the course of Central Texas history.
At Yesleta, the expedition proceeded to drink a lot of Río
Bravo water and to search for more of el pelo del perro or
"the hair of the dog" that had bitten them the night
before. Don Juan here made the acquaintance of a young Indian
beauty named Wahapee who had recently arrived with her Tewa father,
Pupu2. She confided in Don Juan that her father had gotten into
some kind of trouble in Taos and had to leave quickly. Still unaware
that he was leading the expedition the wrong way, Don Juan enlisted
Wahapee and Pupu as guides.
The recovered but misdirected expedition left Yesleta, October
16, 1682, still headed in a southeasterly direction3. As he traveled,
Estufa continued nipping from his ample supply of El Paso brandy
and did not notice the expedition's contrary direction. As they
traveled, Pupu intimated the he had a Comanche half-brother who
was in the gold mining business in Roby, Texas; and that business
was good. At mention of gold, Don Juan's befogged mind cleared
somewhat; and he suggested that Pupu take him to meet his brother.
The lust for gold caused Don to lose all sense of duty, and he
ordered Pupu and the expedition to quick march to Roby in Tejas
territory. The expedition reached Roby, November 3, 1682 where
Don Juan made arrangements to visit the half brother and explore
his mine. The half brother, named Cibola Tahoka Wapa or Buffalo
Bull Caca as the Spanish translated his name from Comanche, showed
Don Juan several chunks of high-grade ore. Buffalo Bull Caca could
not be persuaded to take Don Juan to the mine. This Mexican stand
off lasted for several days until one day Buffalo Bull Caca was
working shirt less, and Don Juan noticed that his ample body was
covered with a remarkably detailed tattoo. The elaborate tattoo
was unusual to Don Juan because it contained several non-Indian
symbols such as Roman and Arabic numerals.
Don Juan expressed his admiration for this arresting tattoo, and
he asked where he could get a tattoo like it. Buffalo Bull Caca
was at first evasive, but he finally admitted that the tattoo
was the work of an Indian tattoo artist who lived in nearby Aspermont.
Don Juan immediately set out for Aspermont where he found the
tattoo parlor housed in a small tepee just outside the city limits.
The artist agreed to
2 The Indian girl's name is also mentioned as Whopee or Whoee.
Pupu is a Tewa nickname for Pohojaque, a common name at this time.
3 Modern day I-20 follows this same route.
tattoo Don Juan, and it was during these lengthily tattoo sessions
that
Don Juan learned that Buffalo Bull Caca was not really in the
gold mining business. He was instead in the agave root distilling
business making a potent product called mescal4.
The tattoo artist further added that the gold ore that Buffalo
Bull Caca possessed was received in payment for the mescal that
he shipped to Spanish mines operating in Northern Mexico. He added
that the tattoo covering Buffalo Bull Caca's huge stomach was
actually a map to his still called Taovaya which was located close
to the Double Mountain in Stonewall County. When pressed to explain
why there were Arabic and Roman numerals in the tattoo, the artist
replied the these figures represent the alcoholic proof of the
mescal after Buffalo Bull Caca watered it down with muddy Salt
Fork of the Brazos river water. Further explaining, the artist
said that the mescal diluted for distribution at Roby was somewhere
in the neighborhood of 71 proof. This proof rating was shown in
Roman numerals in Buffalo Bull Caca's tattoo.
Don Juan was at first upset by Buffalo Bull Caca's scam, but he
mellowed as he realized that this operation could be his own gold
mine. Don Juan expeditiously returned to Roby where he confronted
Buffalo Bull Caca with the facts. Buffalo Bull Caca freely admitted
guilt before Don Juan could use more traditional Spanish methods
of persuasion to find the truth. Don Juan then demanded fifty
percent of the take in return for Spanish protection. He also
pledged to promote mescal sales through franchises established
in Chihuahua City and Guadalajara. Buffalo Bull Caca knew perfectly
well that the Spanish were really the only ones that he needed
protection from; but regardless, he reluctantly entered into this
forced agreement.
Thus history was made. The still at Taovaya continued as the main
source for miners' mescal; and Roby, Aspermont, and Clyde became
major mescal distribution points for the Mexican franchise. Pay
for the mescal was made in high-grade gold ore, and Don Juan hired
Spanish engineers to supervise the smelter operations in De Leon
and Brownwood. Don Juan's agents kept the myth alive that there
was a huge gold mine or at least a rich buried treasure at Taovaya.
Future historians were to follow the same scent.
4 Buffalo Bull Caca had learned agave root fermenting from the Mescalero Indians, and the Spanish had taught him how to distill this pungent root wine.
The Estufa Expedition would probably have disappeared in the dust
of some obscure Spanish archive if it had not been for a descendent
of Don Juan Estufa de la Escoba y Tornillo. The Estufa "mine"
resurfaced because of a seemingly insignificant event, which occurred
in Texas in the late 1800's. In 1882, an old Mexican was arrested
in Laredo, Texas, and charged with cattle rustling. The Texas
Rangers who arrested the suspected rustler judged him guilty.
As they prepared to hang him, they asked him if he had any last
requests. The old Mexican, whose name was Guadalupe Estufa, replied
that his only request was to be allowed enough time to collect
a treasure map that he had inherited. Old Lupe offered the map
to the Rangers if they would let him quietly disappear into Old
Mexico. The trade appealed to the Rangers because they knew that
Old Lupe was running from creditors because his failed used ox
cart business, and he had turned to cattle rustling only because
he needed quick cash flow. The deal for the map was made. Lupe
went into Old Mexico, and the Rangers had the Estufa Treasure
map.
The Rangers soon realized that they possessed none other than
the original map of Don Juan Estufa de la Escoba y Tornillo. The
Rangers were impressed with the map, and they went to work immediately
to find the "treasure". What the Rangers did not realize
was that the spider rocks that were indicated in the map were
no more than master designs for maps that Don Juan issued from
his mescal distributorships at Roby, Aspermont, and Clyde. The
mysterious symbols actually represent mescal brand logos, and
the Roman and Arabic numerals represent the alcoholic proof of
Buffalo Bull Caca's mescal at the three different locations. By
interpreting the numerals on each map one can readily see that
the mescal at Roby was 29 proof, at Clyde it was 71 proof, and
at Aspermont is was a strong 94 proof. As added insurance, the
three maps were tattooed on distribution managers' bodies5.
After exhaustive research, I can add a footnote to this fascinating
tale of treasure and booze. I have been able to locate some of
Pupu's and Wahapee's descendants in New Mexico where they operate
a chain of lucrative curio shops located along the major highways.
They lure the tourists with signs that promise, "See the
Thing" or "Visit the Den of Rattlesnakes" and "Just
Five Miles Ahead". Some of Buffalo Bull's descendants have
been located in Okalahoma where they operate a bait shop and filling
station catering to Texans at Lake Texhoma. Don Juan Estufa de
la Escoba y Tornillo's heirs can be found from Chicago to Guatemala
where they continue prospering from their entrepreneurial talents.